Anti-Bullying Week, organised by the Anti-Bullying Alliance, ran from the 14th to the 18th November.
This year, the theme is ‘Reach Out’ and aims to empower young people to do something positive to counter the harm and hurt that bullying can cause.
This blog offers guidance for parents and carers about the signs which may indicate your child is experiencing online bullying, and practical tips on how to support your child online if they are ever to encounter it.
With the rise of social media, and children starting their online lives at a younger age, children are interacting with each other more and more online. This has many positives but can also leave parents and carers worried about the interactions their child is having with people online.
What is online bullying?
Online bullying, also known as cyberbullying, is when someone uses the internet to target and deliberately upset someone. This behaviour can make the victim feel sad, embarrassed, different to others, or alone. It is important that children are aware that no form of bullying is okay, online or offline.
Online bullying can include nasty messages, posting pictures and videos of the person being targeted, or purposely leaving someone out of a group chat or game. Sometimes, online bullying happens anonymously, meaning that the child may not know who it is that is bullying them.
How can I tell if my child is being bullied online?
A lot of the signs that your child may be experiencing online bullying are similar to those of face to face bullying. This could include a change in mood, change in eating habits, reluctance to go to school, or a change in friendship group.
Other signs a child is experiencing online bullying can include…
Less willing to talk
Your child may be less willing to talk about their online experiences as they have become less positive. They may be embarrassed about what is happening, feel they may have done something to cause this behaviour towards them, or simply do not know how to tell you about it.
A change in the amount of time they are spending online
Sometimes if a child is being bullied online, they may want to spend less time using the internet. However, they may also be online more, as they are checking for posts which are targeting them.
Hiding their devices
Children experiencing bullying may hide their devices or be secretive with them so that you cannot see how often they are getting notifications or what is being sent to them.
No longer attending offline activities they used to enjoy
Sometimes children are less willing to go to face to face events due to the bullying they experience online. This may be because they are worried that people have seen posts about them, or they know the bully will be there.
How can I support my child with this issue?
Have an open conversation
It is important that open conversations about what children are doing and experiencing online start as soon as their online life does. This will make it easier for children to come forward if there is anything which they are experiencing which upsets or distresses them.
It also offers you the chance to ask about what they are doing online and share some of what you are doing too. This will allow your child to see that you are not ‘checking up on them’, but that you are interested in this area of their life.
Talk to your child about who they are communicating with online
It can be tricky to start these conversations, so our Have A Conversation page can be a great place to get inspiration as to how to do this. We also have guidance in ‘Let’s Talk About Life Online’, which includes key messages to share with your child about how to keep themselves safe in their online life.
Discuss the importance of kindness and respect with your child
The internet should be an enjoyable space for all users. Unfortunately, this is not always the case, and children can be exposed to online bullying or other potential harms.
If this is the case, it is important that your child knows to speak to an adult about what they have experienced.
It is a great time, during this conversation, to talk about being a good online role model by creating a space which is enjoyable for all users.
Talk to your child about the platforms they are using
Have an open conversation about what platforms your child is using. Help them to set up accounts, to select privacy settings which can help them control who sees their posts and who can contact them online.
By having private profiles and knowing who they are communicating with online, the risks are reduced. Your child may receive messages or see posts which are not appropriate even with these settings in place, so make sure your child knows where to find the block and report tools on each platform, and that they know how to use them.
Do not deny access to tech
Some children we have worked with say they are less likely to report negative online experiences as they are worried their tech will be taken away from them. This may seem very unfair to them if they have not done anything wrong, and they feel as if they are being punished.
We encourage you to be curious and not furious- talk to your child about how the negative experience started, stay calm, and decide on next steps with your child.
Know where to go for help and support
Remember that if your child is experiencing bullying, there is plenty of support available.
Reach out to your child’s school. They are best placed to help, especially if you think the bullying is occurring with children from the same school. They will be able to support your child and investigate the incident. Reporting to the school is very important, as it may be part of a larger picture which you may not be aware of.
You can also utilise the block and report tools. These tools help to prevent bullies contacting your child and allow you to report any behaviour which may be against the platform community guidelines. You can find more information about reporting tools on our website.
